Great work. I still remember the old TV show “Murphy Brown” where Candice Bergman’s character decided to become a single mom. The reactions from both sides was very telling. The controversy surrounding this show really was polarizing, even in the early 90s. While the left blasted VP Dan Quayle for his remarks about children needing a father, Candice herself said in later interviews that she agreed with a lot of what the VP said.
It used to be a badge of shame to be a single mother. Now it is celebrated and our welfare system actually promotes it. If we removed the welfare incentives, perhaps women will get the fathers to support them instead of the state (taxpayers).
Children need the influences of both parents--Mom and Dad. I don't think I have to explain all the details, just point out that there is a divine reason for both parents in a family unit. And here's where Masonry comes in. The better the father is able to provide for, protect, teach, and nurture through example, the better the family unit will be. The better the family, the better the community. The term "toxic masculinity" applies to the "dine and dash" group of nihilistic narcissists who abuse everyone around them. Fortunately, they are a relatively small cross section of our population. A young man (28) I am mentoring (with great pleasure, I might add) told me on the night of his initiation, "My generation NEEDS this!" The members of his generation were raised by TV and video games, with very little in the way of guidance and instruction in what to expect as an adult. Freemasonry can offset that neglect through fellowship, mentoring, and moral philosophy. Perhaps our beloved craft can do much to eradicate toxic masculinity. Just my thoughts...
Freemasonry has the potential to offer male mentorship. But first it needs to promote male bonding. Not bickering about insufficient funds. Before a man can be coached, he needs to believe the men doing the coaching are suitable to offer advice. If they can't even afford to outfit their lodge with a quality experience, they already have failed at one of the easiest types of advice to offer. Financial advice. If they can't even offer the easiest type of life advice, something as logical and mathematically simple as financial advice, how can they offer any other type of life advice? Why would a man who is professionally or financially successful but lacks personal or sexual success trust the advice of men who can't adequately manage their professional and financial lives enough to offer a quality lodge experience to new initiates? If he doesn't trust them professionally or financially, how can he open up to them about his personal or sexual struggles which are much more difficult to share openly?
It’s ironic that you mention the finances being the key to what you see as an issue with our Fraternity, as finances is one of the things that I learned a lot about from my experience in Freemasonry. From sitting on Centralia’s Building association meetings and watching their proceedings, then becoming that association’s chairman, I learned a lot about investments, and I was able to apply those lessons when I became the Treasurer of Centralia’s York Rite. The Royal Arch had since gained over $25,000 over the last 8 years due to those lessons.
Not saying that you’re incorrect, as I know what you’re talking about. It might depend on the Lodge. And, as many will note, the Lodges that are proactive, investing many things (as well as finances) properly, are succeeding. Those who are not, are failing.
Great topic WM! You mentioned, looking deep within, and a key word to me, “Know yourself” and what it means to be masculine. This topic goes back to, and written on stone, from the Luxor Temple of Egypt, the Sanctuary of Apollo, in Greece, Ancient Harran, and even the Tyler’s chair outside the main entrance to the Temple Room at the House of the Temple in Washington, D.C.
From Jewish mysticism, to understand yourself, there are explained two parts of a mankind’s nature, called Nephesh; the lower animal soul of all sentient beings. It can be described as subjective thoughts, which makes impulsive decisions based on survival and personal perspectives. The other is Neshamah; the embodiment of emotional and thinking functions of the personality. And likewise can be described as based on an individual’s perspective, but with thinking based around a set of logical standards.
The third less known, but most important part of the self is the Ruah, or spirit. This part of the human is not shared with other sentient beings; it’s the spiritual consciousness; nous, giving understanding to subjects such as the seven liberal arts. In Gnosticism, it is said this (spirit) was given to mankind, from Sophia, in secret, that made him higher than the gods who created them. The desire for spirituality is seeking wisdom, from which we have the Greek word ‘philosophy,’ containing two root words, ‘philo’ and ‘sophia,’ meaning ‘love’ and ‘wisdom.’ The Greek word used for spirit is psyche. Psychology is the study of psyche, which relates to the conscious and subconscious mind. This is the part of the mind that affects our behavior and emotions. When we act or behave by forces that we believe in or theorize about, corresponds to subjective thoughts. The word “subjective” refers to illusions that we perceive as real, because it simply is what has been programmed in our minds, the limitation or “prison” of our ego.
If we conjure up the ideology of going to war to kill, then we remain subject to the lower nature of mankind. Patriotism can be toxic if used incorrectly, this I learned after having a conversation with a brother who was a photographer in War World II, and several friends who suffer from PTSD.
To truly liberate yourself and be free, the psyche has to transcend, and one has to be aware of themselves. Not with the subjective reasoning, or his animalistic thoughts. But instead, with our objective transcendent developments.
To be ruled by our desire, whether that be sexual or aggressive impulses, would be acting under the influences of the lower self. One topic that comes up in current media is, what the difference between a man and a woman is. (Referring to Senator Blackburn asking Supreme Court nominee Kentanji Jackson, “what is a woman?”). I initially thought that was a thoughtless question, with an obvious answer. But on further introspection, I thought, a similar topic must be a discussion among the angels, but rather what is the difference between spirit and man (soul). When a man identifies as a woman, is it the same as a man who lives in his lower nature and identifies as a spiritual being?
To be a spiritual being, one must attain a change in order to awaken the spiritual consciousness (nous). We must even lose our own personal identity of being masculine or feminine. This means that the change must be radical and complete. Our personal identity, for example, "I am so and so, (related to job title, wealth status, or nationality)" must be eliminated from oneself; and then one day we will find that we have no personal identity to fight and kill for, but are stripped down of the physical influences outside of a spiritual being, who are experiencing life subjectively, and together as one. This form of transcending thinking, to me, is simply the phrase, “I AM,” or "I AM WHAT I AM."
The fraternity needs to take a serious look at one of the foundations of Freemasonry, “Making good men better”. If this is one of our foremost goals, then by succeeding in this area we rid our members of Toxic Masculinity. We become men who don’t abuse, don’t bully, look out for one another. We’re then able to teach our sons what it means to be a true man. We have, over the past 30-40 years, experienced the dumbing down of society. Teaching to the least common denominator and rewarding minimal effort. We see this in Freemasonry when we pass or raise a Brother based solely on his ability to memorize and recite words. Has the Brother been taught, or learned, what it means to be a Fellow or Master?
All societies move in a circular fashion. “Hard times create hard men, hard men create good times, good times create soft men, soft men create hard times”, even this of ours.
“But today vast numbers of young men are raised by single mothers. Taught by female teachers, and grow up in a society that teaches them that they are somehow ‘toxic’ simply by being born male.
To develop into mentally and emotionally healthy men, they need male role models. They need to be instructed, by men, into what it means to be a man. They crave the acceptance of other men. But far too often today, the only affirmation they receive is from women.
This results, as the survey discussed above points out, in feminized men.”
I attended Grade school from Kindergarten to 3rd grade from 1979 to 1983. In that school, there were employed only 3 men: the Principal, the Janitor, and one 3rd grade teacher, Mr. Dunn. All the other teachers and staff were women.
The 3rd grade wing of the school was off-limits to younger students, chiefly due to the older students warding off the little kids from their “turf.” But we wanted to get in that building, for one reason. We wanted to get to Mr. Dunn. So we waylaid him when he went from his classroom to the main office and back. There wasn’t a time I remember Mr. Dunn walking down the hallway with a handful of boys trailing him, asking questions. Many times, I was one of those boys. I remember vividly one time I asked Mr. Dunn for help was my coat zipper was stuck badly, and it was beyond my capabilities to unjam it. I wanted Mr. Dunn to fix it, even though almost any of the teachers could have easily fixed it in retrospect.
Back in the early 80’s, the only time you visited the Principal was when you were in trouble. Thankfully, that’s changed since then, and the school’s principal is more accessible, in a more positive manner. And it was clear to us kids that the janitor hated kids. You can’t fool children. He had no business working in a grade school.
We knew back then, as young boys, that there are just some things that a woman can’t answer. We needed a man to share our concerns and questions with. Now, did my classmates become feminized? Fortunately, no, as we found other ways, and had succeeded in become good leaders.
Nowadays, I see too much of “couples” where the young woman isn’t so much the guy’s girlfriend as much as she’s effectively his “mother.” The guy is almost worthless as a man, being bossed around by his girlfriend as if he’s a pet dog. Sometimes I get them in the barbershop, and the girl starts bossing her boyfriend, then she tries it on me. Needless to say, it doesn’t work, but I remember one thinking I was being insolent and defiant. That didn’t end well, as I informed the little lady who was young enough to be my daughter that.. well, I’ll be nice here. It didn’t end well. But it should never be this way. And Cameron’s right. We do have the tools to correct this problem.
Now, if we can get these guys in their hoodies who never look up from their smartphones to see they’re walking out into speeding traffic to understand…
interesting post.. Something i have been meditating on for a long while as I've watch special interest groups try to disassemble any positive masculine influence and a general counter cultural fashion seems to invade every element and aspect of life. What does it mean to be masculine? The antient schools of thought put a divine feminine and masculine as the duality of nature is considered. Today, it seems to me, as a father There are few places I can go that don't focus on sports, idolatry, religion or materialism that offer any arena for my need for positive masculine influence beyond our beloved craft. It pains me to see it torn apart from the inside over politics related to the profane world, and simultaneously attacked from the outside by those who through misunderstanding or for what ever reason would see it abolished. the guardian news seems to have it out for UGLE. That said I found a great book on what it means to be masculine in AMERICA from Most Worshipful Robert G Davis. I dont agree with every thing he says always but its a great thesis and an easy read.
Great work. I still remember the old TV show “Murphy Brown” where Candice Bergman’s character decided to become a single mom. The reactions from both sides was very telling. The controversy surrounding this show really was polarizing, even in the early 90s. While the left blasted VP Dan Quayle for his remarks about children needing a father, Candice herself said in later interviews that she agreed with a lot of what the VP said.
It used to be a badge of shame to be a single mother. Now it is celebrated and our welfare system actually promotes it. If we removed the welfare incentives, perhaps women will get the fathers to support them instead of the state (taxpayers).
You painted quite a portrait of our atomized, dysfunctional society. There is much wrong today.
The modern - and wrong - vision of masculinity has had its chance. Most everyone can see how destructive it is.
The good news?
“Freemasonry, notwithstanding, still survives.”
We stand ready with a timeless and proven vision.
Let us describe it vividly, let us improve the Lodge experience to reflect that vision.
If we focus on this for say two years, think what we can accomplish together!
Children need the influences of both parents--Mom and Dad. I don't think I have to explain all the details, just point out that there is a divine reason for both parents in a family unit. And here's where Masonry comes in. The better the father is able to provide for, protect, teach, and nurture through example, the better the family unit will be. The better the family, the better the community. The term "toxic masculinity" applies to the "dine and dash" group of nihilistic narcissists who abuse everyone around them. Fortunately, they are a relatively small cross section of our population. A young man (28) I am mentoring (with great pleasure, I might add) told me on the night of his initiation, "My generation NEEDS this!" The members of his generation were raised by TV and video games, with very little in the way of guidance and instruction in what to expect as an adult. Freemasonry can offset that neglect through fellowship, mentoring, and moral philosophy. Perhaps our beloved craft can do much to eradicate toxic masculinity. Just my thoughts...
Freemasonry has the potential to offer male mentorship. But first it needs to promote male bonding. Not bickering about insufficient funds. Before a man can be coached, he needs to believe the men doing the coaching are suitable to offer advice. If they can't even afford to outfit their lodge with a quality experience, they already have failed at one of the easiest types of advice to offer. Financial advice. If they can't even offer the easiest type of life advice, something as logical and mathematically simple as financial advice, how can they offer any other type of life advice? Why would a man who is professionally or financially successful but lacks personal or sexual success trust the advice of men who can't adequately manage their professional and financial lives enough to offer a quality lodge experience to new initiates? If he doesn't trust them professionally or financially, how can he open up to them about his personal or sexual struggles which are much more difficult to share openly?
Freemasonry is lost in the weeds.
Bro. Jack:
It’s ironic that you mention the finances being the key to what you see as an issue with our Fraternity, as finances is one of the things that I learned a lot about from my experience in Freemasonry. From sitting on Centralia’s Building association meetings and watching their proceedings, then becoming that association’s chairman, I learned a lot about investments, and I was able to apply those lessons when I became the Treasurer of Centralia’s York Rite. The Royal Arch had since gained over $25,000 over the last 8 years due to those lessons.
Not saying that you’re incorrect, as I know what you’re talking about. It might depend on the Lodge. And, as many will note, the Lodges that are proactive, investing many things (as well as finances) properly, are succeeding. Those who are not, are failing.
Great topic WM! You mentioned, looking deep within, and a key word to me, “Know yourself” and what it means to be masculine. This topic goes back to, and written on stone, from the Luxor Temple of Egypt, the Sanctuary of Apollo, in Greece, Ancient Harran, and even the Tyler’s chair outside the main entrance to the Temple Room at the House of the Temple in Washington, D.C.
From Jewish mysticism, to understand yourself, there are explained two parts of a mankind’s nature, called Nephesh; the lower animal soul of all sentient beings. It can be described as subjective thoughts, which makes impulsive decisions based on survival and personal perspectives. The other is Neshamah; the embodiment of emotional and thinking functions of the personality. And likewise can be described as based on an individual’s perspective, but with thinking based around a set of logical standards.
The third less known, but most important part of the self is the Ruah, or spirit. This part of the human is not shared with other sentient beings; it’s the spiritual consciousness; nous, giving understanding to subjects such as the seven liberal arts. In Gnosticism, it is said this (spirit) was given to mankind, from Sophia, in secret, that made him higher than the gods who created them. The desire for spirituality is seeking wisdom, from which we have the Greek word ‘philosophy,’ containing two root words, ‘philo’ and ‘sophia,’ meaning ‘love’ and ‘wisdom.’ The Greek word used for spirit is psyche. Psychology is the study of psyche, which relates to the conscious and subconscious mind. This is the part of the mind that affects our behavior and emotions. When we act or behave by forces that we believe in or theorize about, corresponds to subjective thoughts. The word “subjective” refers to illusions that we perceive as real, because it simply is what has been programmed in our minds, the limitation or “prison” of our ego.
If we conjure up the ideology of going to war to kill, then we remain subject to the lower nature of mankind. Patriotism can be toxic if used incorrectly, this I learned after having a conversation with a brother who was a photographer in War World II, and several friends who suffer from PTSD.
To truly liberate yourself and be free, the psyche has to transcend, and one has to be aware of themselves. Not with the subjective reasoning, or his animalistic thoughts. But instead, with our objective transcendent developments.
To be ruled by our desire, whether that be sexual or aggressive impulses, would be acting under the influences of the lower self. One topic that comes up in current media is, what the difference between a man and a woman is. (Referring to Senator Blackburn asking Supreme Court nominee Kentanji Jackson, “what is a woman?”). I initially thought that was a thoughtless question, with an obvious answer. But on further introspection, I thought, a similar topic must be a discussion among the angels, but rather what is the difference between spirit and man (soul). When a man identifies as a woman, is it the same as a man who lives in his lower nature and identifies as a spiritual being?
To be a spiritual being, one must attain a change in order to awaken the spiritual consciousness (nous). We must even lose our own personal identity of being masculine or feminine. This means that the change must be radical and complete. Our personal identity, for example, "I am so and so, (related to job title, wealth status, or nationality)" must be eliminated from oneself; and then one day we will find that we have no personal identity to fight and kill for, but are stripped down of the physical influences outside of a spiritual being, who are experiencing life subjectively, and together as one. This form of transcending thinking, to me, is simply the phrase, “I AM,” or "I AM WHAT I AM."
The fraternity needs to take a serious look at one of the foundations of Freemasonry, “Making good men better”. If this is one of our foremost goals, then by succeeding in this area we rid our members of Toxic Masculinity. We become men who don’t abuse, don’t bully, look out for one another. We’re then able to teach our sons what it means to be a true man. We have, over the past 30-40 years, experienced the dumbing down of society. Teaching to the least common denominator and rewarding minimal effort. We see this in Freemasonry when we pass or raise a Brother based solely on his ability to memorize and recite words. Has the Brother been taught, or learned, what it means to be a Fellow or Master?
All societies move in a circular fashion. “Hard times create hard men, hard men create good times, good times create soft men, soft men create hard times”, even this of ours.
“But today vast numbers of young men are raised by single mothers. Taught by female teachers, and grow up in a society that teaches them that they are somehow ‘toxic’ simply by being born male.
To develop into mentally and emotionally healthy men, they need male role models. They need to be instructed, by men, into what it means to be a man. They crave the acceptance of other men. But far too often today, the only affirmation they receive is from women.
This results, as the survey discussed above points out, in feminized men.”
I attended Grade school from Kindergarten to 3rd grade from 1979 to 1983. In that school, there were employed only 3 men: the Principal, the Janitor, and one 3rd grade teacher, Mr. Dunn. All the other teachers and staff were women.
The 3rd grade wing of the school was off-limits to younger students, chiefly due to the older students warding off the little kids from their “turf.” But we wanted to get in that building, for one reason. We wanted to get to Mr. Dunn. So we waylaid him when he went from his classroom to the main office and back. There wasn’t a time I remember Mr. Dunn walking down the hallway with a handful of boys trailing him, asking questions. Many times, I was one of those boys. I remember vividly one time I asked Mr. Dunn for help was my coat zipper was stuck badly, and it was beyond my capabilities to unjam it. I wanted Mr. Dunn to fix it, even though almost any of the teachers could have easily fixed it in retrospect.
Back in the early 80’s, the only time you visited the Principal was when you were in trouble. Thankfully, that’s changed since then, and the school’s principal is more accessible, in a more positive manner. And it was clear to us kids that the janitor hated kids. You can’t fool children. He had no business working in a grade school.
We knew back then, as young boys, that there are just some things that a woman can’t answer. We needed a man to share our concerns and questions with. Now, did my classmates become feminized? Fortunately, no, as we found other ways, and had succeeded in become good leaders.
Nowadays, I see too much of “couples” where the young woman isn’t so much the guy’s girlfriend as much as she’s effectively his “mother.” The guy is almost worthless as a man, being bossed around by his girlfriend as if he’s a pet dog. Sometimes I get them in the barbershop, and the girl starts bossing her boyfriend, then she tries it on me. Needless to say, it doesn’t work, but I remember one thinking I was being insolent and defiant. That didn’t end well, as I informed the little lady who was young enough to be my daughter that.. well, I’ll be nice here. It didn’t end well. But it should never be this way. And Cameron’s right. We do have the tools to correct this problem.
Now, if we can get these guys in their hoodies who never look up from their smartphones to see they’re walking out into speeding traffic to understand…
interesting post.. Something i have been meditating on for a long while as I've watch special interest groups try to disassemble any positive masculine influence and a general counter cultural fashion seems to invade every element and aspect of life. What does it mean to be masculine? The antient schools of thought put a divine feminine and masculine as the duality of nature is considered. Today, it seems to me, as a father There are few places I can go that don't focus on sports, idolatry, religion or materialism that offer any arena for my need for positive masculine influence beyond our beloved craft. It pains me to see it torn apart from the inside over politics related to the profane world, and simultaneously attacked from the outside by those who through misunderstanding or for what ever reason would see it abolished. the guardian news seems to have it out for UGLE. That said I found a great book on what it means to be masculine in AMERICA from Most Worshipful Robert G Davis. I dont agree with every thing he says always but its a great thesis and an easy read.
https://robertgdavis.net/product/understanding-manhood-in-america/