From the day I shared with my wife, Karen, that I was interested in becoming a Freemason she has supported my journey. Her support during these past two years while I sat in the East was especially important to me. To use a cliche, Freemasonry has made me a better man, husband and father. I’m uniquely aware when I’m separated from the brothers. This forum is a daily reminder to me to be a Mason in every way, every day.
For the majority of my Masonic journey, I have been single, and my support came from my Brethren in Lodge (and out). I have enjoyed the support and encouragement of my mentors, who helped me to understand what I was doing and why I was doing it. It's not all about Ritual, although that's important, too! The main part is creating and maintaining a "presence" at each station I have held. I now have a lovely Lady in my life, who supports and encourages me. "You need to go to Lodge!" she will say, and check my appearance before I leave the house. "Knock 'em dead!" will be her words before I depart. Then, when I come home, she will want to know how it went, who was there, and if we did anything interesting. Because of her, I feel renewed every time I engage in a Masonic activity!
I had been around Freemasons since I was in diapers. I didn’t really understand it until I got into my early teens. My Great Uncle lived in Tenino and was a member of Tenino Lodge, and so was my Uncle. This is why I joined Tenino Lodge, despite living 10 miles south in Centralia. I had known the Senior Deacon of Tenino Lodge since I was a kid, and I was familiar with most of the active members of that Lodge for a few years before I joined.
My Mother is an officer in the local OES Chapter, and my brother is also a member of Tenino Lodge. Yes, Freemasonry is totally a part of all my family’s lives.
But here’s another take on the subject of Family. I’ve never married. In this day and age, that’s not a big deal, but many of us have noted throughout the years, how many Worshipful Masters, Grand Lodge officers and Grand Masters have noted how important their wife (or having a wife) is in their Masonic Journey, and behind every good Mason is a good wife. I’ve also heard that some Brothers shouldn’t have taken on a leadership position because of their situation with their wife (or lack thereof.) As I type this, it has become more clear to me that most of these Brothers mean that if they are truly to succeed, they need the support of their wife. If the Brother’s wife is not supporting what he’s doing, it will make his job considerably more difficult. It doesn’t necessarily mean that a Mason will be at a severe disadvantage if he’s single compared to if he’s married, or that a Mason who is single is shut out of opportunities to contribute to our Fraternity.
One more very important thing concerning family. There are many family members of Brothers who take the Brotherhood of our Fraternity very seriously. I don’t have any biological nieces or nephews, but I do have several of each through our Fraternity. These young ladies and gentlemen truly consider me their uncle, and I have indeed overheard some of them introducing themselves to friends of mine as my niece or nephew. Now, my Brothers, I’m telling you, that means a LOT. It really does. But it’s also the same idea in the other direction, as when I joined, I gained several “Grandfathers,” as many of the active members of the Lodges were my grandfather’s age. While I never referred to them as “Grandpa,” I did mention to friends that they were like Grandfathers to me. That’s what this Fraternity does, and it’s one of the points I try to stress when friends ask me about this “Freemason group” I’m a very active member of.
It is one of my biggest obstacles. I do not have the support and encouragement or any family history in the fraternity.
This lack of support is one of the many reasons I do not consider myself suitable for lodge leadership. Which isn't to say I wouldn't love to be in a vibrant educational lodge but the lack of family support means I can't travel to a vibrant lodge, and there are no such lodges local to me.
As a soon to be single guy, I haven’t had issues with family support. My daughter has been out of the nest for years, and I don’t interact with her mom at all.
But I have seen good decent men forced to give up masonry for their wife and family.
I feel sorry for the men who are forced to make those choices.
For some, spending all of their masonic life in OES is what they want. To me that isn’t much different than leaving masonry altogether.
Some can juggle it all and still maintain a healthy home life. But I’ve also talked to men whose fathers were masons that spent all their time in lodge, eastern star, or both, and as a kid they resented it.
It’s about priorities. It’s about balance. It’s about moderation in everything you do.
I was already a Mason when I met my wife. When she introduced me to her dad that went fairly smooth when he saw my ring. He was a PM and it was then I learned of her being a Jobie and all the summers they spent in the park at Granite Falls.
She has been nothing but supportive and encouraging.
From the day I shared with my wife, Karen, that I was interested in becoming a Freemason she has supported my journey. Her support during these past two years while I sat in the East was especially important to me. To use a cliche, Freemasonry has made me a better man, husband and father. I’m uniquely aware when I’m separated from the brothers. This forum is a daily reminder to me to be a Mason in every way, every day.
For the majority of my Masonic journey, I have been single, and my support came from my Brethren in Lodge (and out). I have enjoyed the support and encouragement of my mentors, who helped me to understand what I was doing and why I was doing it. It's not all about Ritual, although that's important, too! The main part is creating and maintaining a "presence" at each station I have held. I now have a lovely Lady in my life, who supports and encourages me. "You need to go to Lodge!" she will say, and check my appearance before I leave the house. "Knock 'em dead!" will be her words before I depart. Then, when I come home, she will want to know how it went, who was there, and if we did anything interesting. Because of her, I feel renewed every time I engage in a Masonic activity!
I had been around Freemasons since I was in diapers. I didn’t really understand it until I got into my early teens. My Great Uncle lived in Tenino and was a member of Tenino Lodge, and so was my Uncle. This is why I joined Tenino Lodge, despite living 10 miles south in Centralia. I had known the Senior Deacon of Tenino Lodge since I was a kid, and I was familiar with most of the active members of that Lodge for a few years before I joined.
My Mother is an officer in the local OES Chapter, and my brother is also a member of Tenino Lodge. Yes, Freemasonry is totally a part of all my family’s lives.
But here’s another take on the subject of Family. I’ve never married. In this day and age, that’s not a big deal, but many of us have noted throughout the years, how many Worshipful Masters, Grand Lodge officers and Grand Masters have noted how important their wife (or having a wife) is in their Masonic Journey, and behind every good Mason is a good wife. I’ve also heard that some Brothers shouldn’t have taken on a leadership position because of their situation with their wife (or lack thereof.) As I type this, it has become more clear to me that most of these Brothers mean that if they are truly to succeed, they need the support of their wife. If the Brother’s wife is not supporting what he’s doing, it will make his job considerably more difficult. It doesn’t necessarily mean that a Mason will be at a severe disadvantage if he’s single compared to if he’s married, or that a Mason who is single is shut out of opportunities to contribute to our Fraternity.
One more very important thing concerning family. There are many family members of Brothers who take the Brotherhood of our Fraternity very seriously. I don’t have any biological nieces or nephews, but I do have several of each through our Fraternity. These young ladies and gentlemen truly consider me their uncle, and I have indeed overheard some of them introducing themselves to friends of mine as my niece or nephew. Now, my Brothers, I’m telling you, that means a LOT. It really does. But it’s also the same idea in the other direction, as when I joined, I gained several “Grandfathers,” as many of the active members of the Lodges were my grandfather’s age. While I never referred to them as “Grandpa,” I did mention to friends that they were like Grandfathers to me. That’s what this Fraternity does, and it’s one of the points I try to stress when friends ask me about this “Freemason group” I’m a very active member of.
It is one of my biggest obstacles. I do not have the support and encouragement or any family history in the fraternity.
This lack of support is one of the many reasons I do not consider myself suitable for lodge leadership. Which isn't to say I wouldn't love to be in a vibrant educational lodge but the lack of family support means I can't travel to a vibrant lodge, and there are no such lodges local to me.
As a soon to be single guy, I haven’t had issues with family support. My daughter has been out of the nest for years, and I don’t interact with her mom at all.
But I have seen good decent men forced to give up masonry for their wife and family.
I feel sorry for the men who are forced to make those choices.
For some, spending all of their masonic life in OES is what they want. To me that isn’t much different than leaving masonry altogether.
Some can juggle it all and still maintain a healthy home life. But I’ve also talked to men whose fathers were masons that spent all their time in lodge, eastern star, or both, and as a kid they resented it.
It’s about priorities. It’s about balance. It’s about moderation in everything you do.
I was already a Mason when I met my wife. When she introduced me to her dad that went fairly smooth when he saw my ring. He was a PM and it was then I learned of her being a Jobie and all the summers they spent in the park at Granite Falls.
She has been nothing but supportive and encouraging.