Took me a few years to realize it but brotherhood didn’t come from any meeting. It came from the multiple other things a lodge does. Talking while we worked; great way to learn from one another. (Found the best pancake recipe that way)
Talking together while working towards some shared goal is exactly what cemented fractured relationships in my Lodge years ago. It's amazing the power working together can have.
I don't remember an occasion of it going the other way in my Lodge, but I can certainly see it happening now that you point it out.
I learned as a very young man that despite the fact that my Father and I were extremely close, we could not work together. He had his way of doing things, I had mine, and never could the two meet.
My Brother. A wonderful post. Informational and powerful if this message gets out to all Masons who are struggling with missing or non existant brotherly love and fellowship.
I disagreed with one bit though, you wrote that these Brothers said / fealt: "Brotherhood we promise doesn’t exist".
I disagree with this so deeply because the Brotherhood does exist but it is dormant awaiting a Brother(s) to re light that flame.
I read an article or book which I don't recall at the moment which hit the 'brutal honesty' button. This person shared this, " if there are not programs in lodge create them, if there is no fellowship create it, if there is a lack of brotherhood re start it".
Do not sit back and allow apathy and a boring lodge to occur. Grab the Masonic Bull by the horns and make the change.
The Brothers that were referred to in the start of this wonderful post could have been and could be the light if they only could see the path in front of them.
Thank you Brother. I appreciate your words, and believe that there is much wisdom contained within your comment.
You are certainly correct, our Masonic experience is most often exactly what we make of it. None of us, from the Worshipful Master to the newest Entered Apprentice needs anyone's permission to improve their Lodge. All we have to do is jump in and do it.
When our Brothers see us doing it, in my experience they will get excited too and jump in to help.
There are of course exceptions. Those exceptions are rare, but I think we have to admit that they exist. I know, having personally watched it, that one of the men who commented here tried to do all of these things and more in his Lodge. He scheduled and planned a camping trip, scheduled, planned, and paid for a very nice Masonic dinner, and he did a lot more than that over the course of years, but at no point did the other members of his Lodge jump in to support or even participate in his endeavors. That Lodge no longer exists, and frankly good riddance, but I just put this here because there are those rare times that things just won't improve, no matter how much effort one pours forth.
Thank you MW once again you give us something to think about
And I think it should be read by every member at every Lodge in every District
I get to be our WM this week since ours will be away on some family projects and we tend to do most of our sitting around the table talking before the meetings and some after and part of that is why I am always there early so when they start showing up there is already a brother there.
Now it is after 6am and I have been awake all night since for some reason I can't think and sleep at the same time so maybe I better try faking sleep or just get up when my *early bird* does for my oatmeal and energy drink (I had to retire from cappuccino and switch to a cold Rock Star)
But every Lodge does need a MW Cameron Bailey in it.
I will be 65 this month so I am a bit over the hill
A timely post in my own journey. Last night I watched a documentary about Archbishop Desmond Tutu and His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama concerning the subject of joy. It was quite profound. In my meditation on it last night and I as awoke this morning I found myself asking: “is Freemasonry an institution which creates joyful men?” In my own experience, I would not say so. The dramas, the struggles, the inner politics, the fighting, the arguing, the disrespect. These are things that have often marred my Masonic journey. It is the opinion of these two spiritual leaders that joy comes from focusing on the needs of others. This is a concept we hold dear in Masonry as well. So why isn’t it working? If I had to point to something it would be my biggest axe to grind in modern Masonry: men who don’t even try to live up to the lofty ideals set forth in our obligations, charges, by-laws, constitutions, and landmarks. I myself would it say I’m a joyful person. And when I think of the immense amount of stress I undergo to attempt to save a dying lodge in a remote part of Oregon, it’s understandable that it isn’t necessarily a joyful experience. But I’m going to work more on focusing on the joy, being of service to others (not just service to Masonry), and cultivating a mindset where joy can thrive.
I've been thinking about this ever since you posted it. Thank you. I appreciate your pointing out about the need for joy, as I guess I've never thought about it in those terms before.
Most often, I guess I've recognized an utter lack of joy in a small number of specific Lodges. Stated Meetings where it was obvious that no one at all was happy to be there, and hopeful that it would just end. Over and over, month after month. Two Lodges really stand out in my memory for this, one is now gone forever, the other is on the path to closure.
But, after reading your words, I've thought about some of my favorite Lodges, and I can see that they are indeed filled with Joy. I've experienced that in the various corners of my Jurisdiction. Not most Lodges, indeed not all that many, but some, and those are all Lodges that are thriving.
Brotherhood is such an important aspect to the Craft. I think our lodge has a few things we do worth sharing:
Esoteric discussion. A lodge meeting for us isn’t primarily a business meeting. We offer Masonic education and discussion. That discussion frequently extends after the meeting. You want to get to know your brother and hear what they believe? Talk about the Craft.
Men’s meeting. Our lodge is probably different here too but the brothers in our lodge prefer to have lodge night be…well brothers only. It’s hard to aspire to great things and talk about them with men when you’re concerned if your wife is having a good time or if she’s listening to you pontificating about nobler deeds. She might remind you that the trash still needs to be taken out! :) We love our ladies and we value our guy time we spend with brothers. Believe it or not we’ve had brothers demit our lodge because we were “too much of a men’s fraternity”.
Camping. We head to the Masonic Family Park for our annual camping weekend. It’s Friday to Sunday and the lodge pays for and arranges meals for Saturday. For brothers that dont have the whole weekend, they can come for just the day on Saturday and still enjoy the fun time.
Labor. I’m talking about work down at the temple. Nothing bonds guys together than working on a project and completing it together. We’ve been actively working on Kent Masonic Hall for years making it better. Painting some room, work party on repairs, etc.
Not only does the building look fantastic, but brothers take pride in a job well done.
I'm a member of four Lodges now (not counting our HIstoric Lodge) and they handle the question of wives/girlfriends/partners differently.
Three of them are what I consider to be rather standard. They invite and encourage the Masons to bring their partners, at least for the dinner portion of the meeting. The partners who come either take off after dinner, or stay until the men finish their meeting.
The other is like your Lodge. While wives certainly aren't given the boot if one or two show up for dinner, it isn't encouraged, and almost all of the Masons come alone.
I presume that historically Masonry was very much like your Lodge, men only. I don't know when or why the push to include wives and/or children around Stated Meetings occurred, but it was probably somebody's idea to stem declining numbers when Freemasonry entered the current cycle of contraction. Obviously it hasn't worked, but I presume that a lot of Masons like it, or they wouldn't do it.
As for me, I can only go off my own limited experience, and my discussions through the years with my own wife, and my three grown daughters who have also been fairly involved with Masonry.
My wife, and the daughters, like it. They don't like the Masonry bit, they aren't included in that, but they like Masons. They like hanging out with Masons from time to time because in general they feel that Masons are good and fun guys to hang out with. They also, have all, tried to make it fun for the other non-Masons who attend events with them.
But that said, when I go off to my Man's Club Lodge, my wife doesn't get upset, or have a desire to go. She understands the desire, and the need, for male only Masonry.
The only time she has ever objected, or I have seen other wives object, are those rare occasions when they were traveling with us on trips that were composed of multiple Masonic events, but a single event attempted to exclude them. That certainly isn't fair. For example, if there are three District Meetings over a weekend, out of area, to welcome them at two, but bar them from a third is unfair, and I think unreasonable.
As for me, I guess that I'm uncertain if this helps to build Brotherhood or not. I've experienced tremendously strong Brotherhood in Lodges that include and that exclude partners.
Took me a few years to realize it but brotherhood didn’t come from any meeting. It came from the multiple other things a lodge does. Talking while we worked; great way to learn from one another. (Found the best pancake recipe that way)
Talking together while working towards some shared goal is exactly what cemented fractured relationships in my Lodge years ago. It's amazing the power working together can have.
Unfortunately if seen it the other way also.
I don't remember an occasion of it going the other way in my Lodge, but I can certainly see it happening now that you point it out.
I learned as a very young man that despite the fact that my Father and I were extremely close, we could not work together. He had his way of doing things, I had mine, and never could the two meet.
I will be bringing up this very topic at a stated meeting this week.
Excellent! I hope that it is well received!
My Brother. A wonderful post. Informational and powerful if this message gets out to all Masons who are struggling with missing or non existant brotherly love and fellowship.
I disagreed with one bit though, you wrote that these Brothers said / fealt: "Brotherhood we promise doesn’t exist".
I disagree with this so deeply because the Brotherhood does exist but it is dormant awaiting a Brother(s) to re light that flame.
I read an article or book which I don't recall at the moment which hit the 'brutal honesty' button. This person shared this, " if there are not programs in lodge create them, if there is no fellowship create it, if there is a lack of brotherhood re start it".
Do not sit back and allow apathy and a boring lodge to occur. Grab the Masonic Bull by the horns and make the change.
The Brothers that were referred to in the start of this wonderful post could have been and could be the light if they only could see the path in front of them.
Never give up.
My 2c
Thank you Brother. I appreciate your words, and believe that there is much wisdom contained within your comment.
You are certainly correct, our Masonic experience is most often exactly what we make of it. None of us, from the Worshipful Master to the newest Entered Apprentice needs anyone's permission to improve their Lodge. All we have to do is jump in and do it.
When our Brothers see us doing it, in my experience they will get excited too and jump in to help.
There are of course exceptions. Those exceptions are rare, but I think we have to admit that they exist. I know, having personally watched it, that one of the men who commented here tried to do all of these things and more in his Lodge. He scheduled and planned a camping trip, scheduled, planned, and paid for a very nice Masonic dinner, and he did a lot more than that over the course of years, but at no point did the other members of his Lodge jump in to support or even participate in his endeavors. That Lodge no longer exists, and frankly good riddance, but I just put this here because there are those rare times that things just won't improve, no matter how much effort one pours forth.
Thank you MW once again you give us something to think about
And I think it should be read by every member at every Lodge in every District
I get to be our WM this week since ours will be away on some family projects and we tend to do most of our sitting around the table talking before the meetings and some after and part of that is why I am always there early so when they start showing up there is already a brother there.
Now it is after 6am and I have been awake all night since for some reason I can't think and sleep at the same time so maybe I better try faking sleep or just get up when my *early bird* does for my oatmeal and energy drink (I had to retire from cappuccino and switch to a cold Rock Star)
But every Lodge does need a MW Cameron Bailey in it.
I will be 65 this month so I am a bit over the hill
>;- D
I hope that you enjoy your time in the East! I know that you will be excellent at it.
A timely post in my own journey. Last night I watched a documentary about Archbishop Desmond Tutu and His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama concerning the subject of joy. It was quite profound. In my meditation on it last night and I as awoke this morning I found myself asking: “is Freemasonry an institution which creates joyful men?” In my own experience, I would not say so. The dramas, the struggles, the inner politics, the fighting, the arguing, the disrespect. These are things that have often marred my Masonic journey. It is the opinion of these two spiritual leaders that joy comes from focusing on the needs of others. This is a concept we hold dear in Masonry as well. So why isn’t it working? If I had to point to something it would be my biggest axe to grind in modern Masonry: men who don’t even try to live up to the lofty ideals set forth in our obligations, charges, by-laws, constitutions, and landmarks. I myself would it say I’m a joyful person. And when I think of the immense amount of stress I undergo to attempt to save a dying lodge in a remote part of Oregon, it’s understandable that it isn’t necessarily a joyful experience. But I’m going to work more on focusing on the joy, being of service to others (not just service to Masonry), and cultivating a mindset where joy can thrive.
I've been thinking about this ever since you posted it. Thank you. I appreciate your pointing out about the need for joy, as I guess I've never thought about it in those terms before.
Most often, I guess I've recognized an utter lack of joy in a small number of specific Lodges. Stated Meetings where it was obvious that no one at all was happy to be there, and hopeful that it would just end. Over and over, month after month. Two Lodges really stand out in my memory for this, one is now gone forever, the other is on the path to closure.
But, after reading your words, I've thought about some of my favorite Lodges, and I can see that they are indeed filled with Joy. I've experienced that in the various corners of my Jurisdiction. Not most Lodges, indeed not all that many, but some, and those are all Lodges that are thriving.
Brotherhood is such an important aspect to the Craft. I think our lodge has a few things we do worth sharing:
Esoteric discussion. A lodge meeting for us isn’t primarily a business meeting. We offer Masonic education and discussion. That discussion frequently extends after the meeting. You want to get to know your brother and hear what they believe? Talk about the Craft.
Men’s meeting. Our lodge is probably different here too but the brothers in our lodge prefer to have lodge night be…well brothers only. It’s hard to aspire to great things and talk about them with men when you’re concerned if your wife is having a good time or if she’s listening to you pontificating about nobler deeds. She might remind you that the trash still needs to be taken out! :) We love our ladies and we value our guy time we spend with brothers. Believe it or not we’ve had brothers demit our lodge because we were “too much of a men’s fraternity”.
Camping. We head to the Masonic Family Park for our annual camping weekend. It’s Friday to Sunday and the lodge pays for and arranges meals for Saturday. For brothers that dont have the whole weekend, they can come for just the day on Saturday and still enjoy the fun time.
Labor. I’m talking about work down at the temple. Nothing bonds guys together than working on a project and completing it together. We’ve been actively working on Kent Masonic Hall for years making it better. Painting some room, work party on repairs, etc.
Not only does the building look fantastic, but brothers take pride in a job well done.
Fraternally,
Zane McCune
Verity 59
I'm a member of four Lodges now (not counting our HIstoric Lodge) and they handle the question of wives/girlfriends/partners differently.
Three of them are what I consider to be rather standard. They invite and encourage the Masons to bring their partners, at least for the dinner portion of the meeting. The partners who come either take off after dinner, or stay until the men finish their meeting.
The other is like your Lodge. While wives certainly aren't given the boot if one or two show up for dinner, it isn't encouraged, and almost all of the Masons come alone.
I presume that historically Masonry was very much like your Lodge, men only. I don't know when or why the push to include wives and/or children around Stated Meetings occurred, but it was probably somebody's idea to stem declining numbers when Freemasonry entered the current cycle of contraction. Obviously it hasn't worked, but I presume that a lot of Masons like it, or they wouldn't do it.
As for me, I can only go off my own limited experience, and my discussions through the years with my own wife, and my three grown daughters who have also been fairly involved with Masonry.
My wife, and the daughters, like it. They don't like the Masonry bit, they aren't included in that, but they like Masons. They like hanging out with Masons from time to time because in general they feel that Masons are good and fun guys to hang out with. They also, have all, tried to make it fun for the other non-Masons who attend events with them.
But that said, when I go off to my Man's Club Lodge, my wife doesn't get upset, or have a desire to go. She understands the desire, and the need, for male only Masonry.
The only time she has ever objected, or I have seen other wives object, are those rare occasions when they were traveling with us on trips that were composed of multiple Masonic events, but a single event attempted to exclude them. That certainly isn't fair. For example, if there are three District Meetings over a weekend, out of area, to welcome them at two, but bar them from a third is unfair, and I think unreasonable.
As for me, I guess that I'm uncertain if this helps to build Brotherhood or not. I've experienced tremendously strong Brotherhood in Lodges that include and that exclude partners.