It Isn't OK To Complain
If you didn't go
Each of us are repeatedly faced with a very stark choice.
We can attend Lodge. Or not.
We aren’t going to be required to attend our Lodge. Most of us have no real compelling reason to not attend our Lodge. We can go, or we can sit at home. The choice is ours alone to make.
That’s OK.
If you don’t come, don’t expect me to really believe that you’re too busy, but you won’t hear me complaining that you made the choice you did. We are all free men, it’s your decision.
But that’s as far as I’m willing to go, because not everything is OK.
What isn’t OK is not attending, and then bitching about some decision that the Lodge made while you were at home watching the television.
Unfortunately, I see this happen a lot. I saw it happen again recently.
The Lodge planned an event. They got everything set up except for a few finishing touches. They arranged the location, they arranged to have all who wanted to attend be there. Everything was ready, set, and good to go.
Then they had another meeting. And they had a couple of guys pop up to complain about the date that had been selected. They pushed to have the date changed.
In this case, thankfully, it didn’t work, those who organized the event ignored the complaining. But often it does work. Often in our Lodges we allow those who complain the loudest to have a sort of veto over Lodge decisions. That’s really harmful when it happens because it allows a minority to run roughshod over the majority.
But it’s even worse when those doing the complaining about something weren’t even there in the early stages. When they didn’t attend while the first and most important decisions were being made.
Come to Lodge or not. It’s your choice. I won’t call you on it.
But, if you skip Lodge and don’t like some decision that was made in your absence, the only honorable thing to do is sit down and shut up. If you don’t like it, you should have been there. You have no right to a heckler’s veto now.
So true. Another facet of that is the brothers who don’t show up all year, but suddenly appear when there’s a vote coming up. A few years ago, my lodge was considering moving to a different building in town, which meant changing our meeting night. We had brothers show up for that vote whom I hadn’t seen in years, and many of them strongly opposed the move. Meanwhile, many of the brethren who attended regularly — and would actually be affected by the change — were generally in favor of it. Ultimately, the motion passed and we moved.
You tell 'em, Cameron